The Vault of Random Drivel presents…
Does anyone remember that? Does it even ring a bell? Kudos to you if you did, because it took more than a few minutes of head scratching before I recalled my blog’s original title.
This begs the question, if the title was so unforgettable, why did I name it so?
Well, let’s cue the cheesy music, start the wave inspired special effects and take you back to where it all began…
At that stage though, I did not have the benefit of hindsight nor knowledge on Search Engine Optimisation; instead all I had was a naïve plan: write and let the internet work its magic. Nevertheless, apart from publishing my first book, I was getting to that stage in my life, like most of my friends, where I wanted to find a good woman to nag me for the rest of my life, because I knew sooner or later I would grow tired of being able to watch television or play video games in peace.
In conjunction with tales about my foray into publication, I thought it might make for interesting reading if I catalogued my exploits on searching for a soul mate, because after all, the world enjoys a good love story.
I realised very quickly that my significant other would not be found on a boat and I certainly was not going to find her amongst a myriad of 7 minutes dates. You can read about how my nautical quest of love sank quicker than the Titanic by perusing my blogs “7 minutes and the Clock’s ticking dude” – Part 1 and Part 2.
The lack of blogs after my unsuccessful romp through the minefield of speed dating, could be taken as a sign that I had given up on love, and hence stopped blogging. On the contrary, love was a brewing, I just did not write about it.
Instead I documented the process leading up to the publication of Between Borders and Buses and the confusing nature of the feminine species with respect to romantic Comedies – in this case Katherine Heigl’s 27 Dresses.
Then literally out of nowhere, came an entry detailing my engagement to Marina.
The question remains: How did I go from a failed speed dating attempt to falling head over heels with the woman of my dreams? The answer is three fold – RSVP, a high flying, world travelling teacher and Facebook.
Like speed dating, online dating filled me (and as I would find out later, Marina too) with scepticism. But as night clubs gave way to dinners and my friends were slowly attaching their very own ball and chain, I found meeting that special someone difficult.
Taking a leap of faith, I created a profile on RSVP, not really expecting much to come of it. But one night, after finalising a few chapters of my book I logged onto RSVP. Amongst the endless list of profiles that were selected for me, one particular one, entitled “SmilingEyes82” stood out.
With anticipation, and a certainly no small amount of butterflies, I sent out a virtual kiss with the prewritten tag line “Would like to get to know you better.”
The next day waiting in my inbox was response from Miss Smiling Eyes. Thus began the email conversations with Marina. Naturally there came a point when I had to ask for her phone number.
But I forgot one crucial aspect. Marina was young and hip and I was old and needed a new hip. You see Marina’s generation did not use phones to communicate but online messaging. I guess carrier pigeons just did not cut it anymore.
So we met virtually thanks to MSN Messenger and without much fuss the conversation flowed freely. There were two aspects I will never forget about that first conversation; one is looking at her picture for the first time and being blown away to the far corners of her room by her pervasive smile. It’s a feeling I still get to this day when she flashes her pearly whites. But what really told me there was something special about Marina, was the when I made an incredibly immature joke about a ninja turtle and a penis, my screen filled with an emphatic “LOL”. Let me tell you this, if a girl can freely laugh at joke about an amphibians reproductive glands the first time you speak to her, she’s a keeper.
Naturally I did not want the conversation to end, but alas it did. But the feeling she evoked in me did not.
As is the case with all love stories, things do not always go to plan. Understandably, Marina was nervous about meeting up. In an age where online personas can rarely match reality, trusting the old adage “What you see is what you get” can be a challenge, if not impossible. Not even with a dump truck of salt, can you completely believe what is said on line.
Weeks went by and as the frequency of the online chats decreased to nought, any hope of meeting up dissipated.
Crestfallen, but still hopeful, I left the possibility of further contact with Marina in the hands of Cupid, because I was unable to shake the notion that Marina and I were meant to be together.
Months passed, and while Marina still flitted around my thoughts I busied myself with the final touches of my book and subsequent book launch. I also happened to organise a BBQ for my then work colleagues at James Hardie, one of whom who had left the company, but was always up for a free feed. Her name is Mariana Ellis. Naturally photos were taken, and as was the norm back then, as it is now, every photo was uploaded to Facebook and tagged.
As luck, or as I prefer to think of it, fate, would have it, Marina was in the same Diploma of Education course with Mariana. Naturally they were friends on Facebook, and as a result, Marina was duly notified of Mariana’s tagging in her news feed.
Later that week, an email arrived in my inbox from Marina asking how I knew Mariana. I responded and our communique began in earnest once again. This time however, phone numbers were exchanged and we agreed to meet up and watch a movie.
Instead of watching a romantic comedy, thereby creating unwanted pressure for a first date, we started our courtship off by watching the most unromantic movie possible – the black comedy “A death at a funeral.” After a casual dinner at Wagamamas, we planted ourselves on the foreshore of Darling harbour in close proximity to the Lindt Café. Relishing the ice-cream and conversation, I gazed across the water and towards a series of iridescent blue neon letters illuminating the adjacent jetty; they spelled out “Marina. If that was not a sign (pun intended) then I don’t know what was.
A second date was duly locked in, during which she quickly realised that I was a comic book aficionado (The word nerd is so passé don’t you think?). When I realised that this revelation did not fill her with dread and the sudden urge to run screaming for the hills I was definitely not going to let her get away. Without hesitation, I reached out and placed her hand mine, with no intention of letting go.
To cement our relationship further, we found out that this was not the first time our families had met. Two generations previous, again through coincidence, Marina’s great aunt met and married my great uncle. After confirming that were definitely not related, I knew that in my heart that our union was meant to be.
Unsurprisingly, the blog on our engagement followed thereafter and led into a series of blogs detailing our journey up the aisle, describing everything from the searching for the bridesmaid dresses, finding the right suit, the best photographer, the perfect reception centre, the right wedding cars and creating our invitations.
Needless to say these blogs were not random drivel but cohesive points in our life.
Even the piece about our honeymoon, while not exactly my best writing, certainly could not be classified as gibberish.
But redesigning the blog became an afterthought as my priorities changed, once we found out Marina was pregnant with Dominic. This development added further pith to my entries about nesting, birth preparation, Dominic’s eventual birth, and how life and times have changed since we were placed under new management.
It was Marina though, who in the true spirit of wives everywhere, nagged me incessantly and told me I should not let my blog fallow and to knuckle down and revamp it and bring it in line with my blog’s subject matter.
With my growing interest in photography, I wanted a name to reflect this, and also represent the captured memories of our family life. Thus, “Drivel” was replaced by “Snapshots and Still-life’s of the Mind’s eye”. The first blog to be uploaded under the new name focused on the signs of parenthood, followed closely by a piece on Marina’s second pregnancy, an in- depth instruction piece for wives regarding the Xbox and a blog about the changing dynamic of our family that came about as a result of Matthew’s arrival.
But like families, writing is organic and while the theme of my blog will always contain insights into life, family and love, the title does not serve its general feeling. Again Marina coaxed me to return to the drawing board and revamp my blog, with the aim to make it more colourful and come up with an appropriate title.
Enter Stage Right: Fortress of Fatherhood.
Named as reference to Superman’s man cave – the Fortress of Solitude, it is also a salute to the importance of father’s position in society. While a mother’s role is pervasive and expansive, a father’s job is one of example and fortitude – a bastion against life’s tumultuous nature. As Dad too, we have to show our kids to stand up to life’s challenges and never lie down in the face of tough times. Unless of course Man Flu is involved then for the sake of all and sundry, lying down is imperative (Wives just don’t understand how dilapidating this disease can be…). Most importantly, dad’s need to teach our kids to laugh in the face of adversity by providing the world with dad jokes, which is as you know is an integral part of a kid’s formative years.
But there is more to being a dad than bad jokes, feigning illness and looking serious and grumpy. With that in mind, come and fly with me as this blog takes flight through the various chapters of our clan, zips through a cavalcade of bad puns and poor attempts of humour and takes you on a up, up and away into the numerous joys of fatherhood, family and life.
As you may have noticed, Marina is a strong believer in my blog and I cannot end this entry without stating how honoured and blessed I am to have such a supportive wife. Sure, my muse helps me craft the prose, but Marina’s insight and critical eye helps me perfect it, thereby making each blog the best they can possibly be.
Marina not only supports this crazy writing hobby of mine, but also humours me by laughing at the horrendous jokes contained there within. Her belief helps me fight through bouts of writers block and turn my thoughts into legible sentences. Without her, I guarantee my blog would have descended into pieces of random drivel that do not say much at all about anything. But thanks to her support and guidance, my writing has reached a level I never dreamed possible.
On that note, I want to conclude by dedicating this blog to my wife Marina, who is the conjunction to my clause
Fortress of Fatherhood 